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results 9/10/2000
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SXW HOUSE SHOW
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filmed live at the Target Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota !!!!!
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OPPONENTS
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TYPE OF MATCH
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TITLE
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STIPULATIONS
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Brimstone & Slayer Red
vs. chez & CROWBAR |
Standard Tag Team Match
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none
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none
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CoolmanP vs. SawDust
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Hard-core / No DQ Match
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none
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none
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Beast, the Crusher vs.
Mr.Extreme, Derrick Lawrence |
Hard-core / No DQ Match
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none
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none
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Kamikaze vs. Muted Radio
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Hard-core / No DQ Match
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none
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none
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The English Beast vs. PORK SODA
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Hard-core / No DQ Match
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none
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none
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Gomez vs. hippy
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Hard-core / No DQ Title Match
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OWN
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SXW vs. APWWF Championship
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" WHAT'S MY AGE AGAIN ? " BY BLINK
182 & S.X.W. PROMO & APWWF VIDEO'S START TO PLAY
..... THE CAMERA PANS THROUGH THE CROWD, THE
21,217 FANS ALL ON THEIR FEET AS THE SHOW THE X-TREME GIRLZ ARE IN THE RING DANCING AS THE PYRO'S FINISH OFF AND THE LIGHTS BRIGHTEN THE ARENA, THE ANNOUNCERS STAND BY ...... |
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Cheryl - " The following match is A one fall, hard-core rules, tag team match. This match has a 15 minute time limit !!! " referee - Jesse ' The Body ' Ventura First some Bon Jovi plays and the fans boo like crazy as chez & CROWBAR make way to ring side. Cheryl - " And their OWN3RS...... " ' Iced Earth ' by Century begins to play as the beastly looking Slayer Red makes his way to the ring, eyes forward ! Cheryl - " Ladies and Gentlemen, coming down the aisle, weighing in at 480lbs, demons beware ... he is ... SLAYER RED!!!!!!! " Cheryl - " And his tag team partner .... " Brimstone's intro music begins to play and the sound of a motorcycle exhaust can be hear, soon Brimstone is seen riding his Harley from the garage, through the halls and stops at the top of the entrance ramp, just under the X-Tremetron Video Screen, he puts the kick stand down and dismounts his bike and makes his way to the ring. Cheryl - " Now making his way to the ring, he hails from London,
England and weighs in at 550 pounds and the SXW Rumble Champion .....
he is ..... BRIMSTONE !!!! " Too start, chez & CROWBAR plan too do this Texas tornado styles, but Slayer Red & Brimstone do not have too as they remain in singles tag action. The chumps also enter the ring with chairs and both try to strike Brimstone who starts, but he strong arms each chair and pushes them back in the chumps faces, leaving a pile of flesh & metal. Brimstone picks CROWBAR up out of the pile for a Gorilla Press Slam on to one of the chairs, then a Powerslam and then Brimstone makes CROWBAR tag chez in. Chez is in and whooped with a Clothesline from Hell then a Samoan Drop after which Brimstone tags in Slayer Red. Slayer Red nails chez with a Death Valley Driver then a powerful Inverted Face Lock Front Suplex, after which Slayer picks up chez and tosses him head over heels into his corner, where CROWBAR is too scared to make the tag and runs out of the arena, leaving chez high & dry ! Slayer Red tags in Brimstone who sets up two table on top of each other while Slayer Red climbs the turn buckle and is handed chez, Bubbah Ray Powerbomb style and smashed through both tables and left in a heap on the mat and scraps of wood, while Slayer Red is standing and uses one foot to make the cover and get the ..... Jesse - " 1.... .2.... .3. " Cheryl - " This match sees CROWBAR & chez OWN3D by ..... BRIMSTONE
& SLAYER RED !!!!!! " |
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Tely - " Well, that being finished on too our next match as the ring
is been cleared of wood & metal ! "
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Cheryl - " The following match is A one fall, hard-core rules non title singles match. This match only needs a 10 minute time limit at best, and that is being nice !!! " referee - Jesse ' The Body ' Ventura Some crap music plays as SawDust or Dusty as his peers call him walks out to the ring and gets drenched in soda's and ice, but he somehow still has the ball to get in the ring. Cheryl - " And his OWN3R ...... " 'The Real Slim Shady' Eminem plays as, Coolman P comes out with a water bottle and walks to the ring, he then jumps to the 2nd turnbuckle, and spits out the water in the air! Cheryl - " Now making his way to the ring and part
OWN3R of the SXW X-Treme Championship title belt..... he is .......
COOLMAN........ P !!!!!!!! " Right off COolmanP was in full control after SawDust hit the weakest Clothesline in history. CoolmanP laid the smack down on SawDust with everything from a Inverted Back Breaker to a Belly to Belly (Tombstone) Piledriver but never went for the pin, each time SawDust would struggle to get up and yell some childish cut down, each time CoolmanP would put him down. An Inverted Atomic Drop, then a Powerbomb Turnbuckle Smash and finally the The People's Kick- Thrust Kick(superkick) into a cover. But then another APWWF chump named Malkkind was seen running to the ring and CoolmanP broke his OWN cover to deal a Sidewalk Slam and Belly to Belly (Tombstone) Piledriver to the piece of shit Malk ! The ring was OWN3D by CoolmanP once again as he slung SawDust up into The CP Screwdriver- Belly to Belly(tombstone) Piledriver off the top rope and then the finally cover. Jesse - " 1..... ...2...... ..3 " Cheryl - " And SawDust is OWN3D by ..... COOLMAN ... PPPPPPP !!!!!!!!
" |
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Tely - " Wow, the SXW is kicking ass and they are playing with the APWWF chumps ! " Styles - " Well this next guy, Mr.Extreme whatever his name is, is gonna get his ass whooped by the Beast !!!! " |
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Cheryl - " The following match is A one fall, hard-core rules non title singles match. This match only needs a 10 minute time limit at best, and that is being nice !!! " referee - Jesse ' The Body ' Ventura More crap music plays as another dud walks to the ring and the good old folks of Minnesota throw their drinks at him and popcorn ! Cheryl - " And his OWN3R ...... " ' More Human Than Human ' blares over the speakers as flames erupt around the entrance and down the ramp. Beast thunders towards the ring, growling and gnashing his teeth. Climbing to the apron, he begins to howl and shake the ring ropes violently. Cheryl - " Now making his way to the ring, he weighs in at 480 pounds
..... he is ....... BEAST, THE CRUSHER !!!!!! This match was also quick, while Derrick Lawrence has many well known alter ego's, he sure didn;t have as many moves, as Beast, the Crusher took him to school, with a fury of punches and then a nasty Double Ax Handle Smash into a Bodyslam then a Press Slam. Mr. Extreme was as good as done right there, but Beast, the Crusher exited the ring and grabbed his Bash&Smash painted chair and got back in the ring allowing Mr. Extreme to stand up and get whacked back down with a thunderous chair shot that knocked out several of his teeth ! Jesse - " .1.... ..2. ... 3. " Now Derrick Lawrence has three well known aliases so Beast wanted three pin falls, it was a Suplex Power Slam(Jack Hammer) and set up for the Total Eclipse - Second Turnbuckle Moonsault and 2nd pin for Beast, the Crusher. Jesse - " 1.... ...2...... 3.. " Now it was 2-0 Beast's lead and he took Derrick into a The Grind- Bearhug and Derrick was trying to scream I Quit but he had no air, then Beast Goes for a short arm clothesline but instead he drives his knee into his opponents gut causing them to double over and then he hits them with a double ax handle in the middle of their back and cover ! Jesse - " 1..... ...2...... ..3 " Cheryl - " And Derrick Lawrence and all his aliases are OWN3D
by ..... BEAST, THE CRUSHER !!!!!!!! " |
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Styles - " Wow, Beast just scored three pinfalls in a row, Derrick Lawrence had his chances in the past, but he pays for them now, like every APWWF chump on this card will ! " Sheila - " Wait, my ability to see the future tells me that ... Kamikaze is going to whoop this Muted Radio punks ass !" |
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Cheryl - " The following match is A one fall, hard-core rules non title singles match. This match only needs a 10 minute time limit at best, and that is being nice !!! " referee - Jesse ' The Body ' Ventura More crap music plays as another punk with his head up his ass walks to the ring and the good old folks of Minnesota throw their drinks at him and popcorn ! Cheryl - " And his OWN3R ...... " Sound of a W.W.II fighter diving, then a loud explosion with flash effects and pyros. "Danger Zone" starts playing and Kamikaze walks to the ring, enters, and bows to his opponent. Cheryl - " Now in the ring from Japan, he is the mysterious and
honorable ..... KAMIKAZE !!!!!!!!! " The quickest match so far as Muted Radio cannot speak, let alone throw a punch, Kamikaze simply OWNS him. Nailing a series of high flying moves from a Flying Neck Breaker to a Guillotine Leg Drop off the Top Rope . Muted Radio was subjected too a Tornado DDT then an Irish Whip into the corner for a Running Corner Vertical Splash (The Bronco Buster). Muted Radio actually got up but that was a mistake as he took a Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker and then was allowed to get back up so Kamikaze could nail his Divine Wind- Corkscrew shooting star press off the top rope and make the first and final pin. Jesse - " 1..... ...2...... ..3 " Cheryl - " And Muted Radio is OWN3D by ..... KAMIKAZE !!!!!!!!
" |
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Tely - " Well it happened again, another punk ass was OWN3D ! " Styles - " Kamikaze normal is mellow but his rage was 100% clear and folks another guy with his head of his rear, PORK SODA is about to get crushed by The English Beast, who takes the follow Englishmen being a jerk seriously ! " |
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Cheryl - " The following match is A one fall, hard-core rules non title singles match. This match only needs a 10 minute time limit at best, and that is being nice !!! " referee - Jesse ' The Body ' Ventura Once again Bon Jovi plays as PORK SODA comes running out looking like a small, ugly wannabe fan boy mine Jovi, dancing and acting like a fool, when The English Beast flies out from the curtain and whacks PORK SODA with a Clothesline take down ! Cheryl - " And his OWN3R ...... " The lights go dark, orange and blue spotlights circle the arena, as the intro to "The Politicians" starts.... The lights converge in the center of the ring, drawing the fans' attention, before there is a HUGE explosion of blue and orange fireworks on the entrance ramp..... "The English Beast" Mark Harrison walks down to the ring, slowly, determinedly, shouting abuse at the fans, who in turn are shouting abuse at him..... He steps into the ring and raises his arms as blue and orange fireworks shoot from the ring posts... Cheryl - " Now in the the ring, he hails from Liverpool and weighs
in at 275 pounds .. he is ... THE ENGLISH BEAST, MARK HARRISON !!!!!
" The English Beast forces PORK SODA into the ring while he tries to squirm away but his is too weak. TEB nails a Pump Handle Back Breaker then a Suplex Bodyslam Through Legs Piledriver and finally a Fireman's Carry into a Brainbuster and PORK SODA is twitching and flailing, finally rolling out of the ring. The English Beast exits the ring and takes PORK SODA over to the UK announcers table and clears it off a bit, during that PORK SODA tries to make a come back, but he is to pathetic and gets a Irish Whip into the ring stairs for his troubles ! TEB has the table set the way he likes it, while all the monitor out of their ports and straight obstacles on the table, which he promptly lands PORK SODA onto them with a Slaughter House- Table to Table,Sit-down Powerbomb and both go crashing through the table. After a few seconds, The English Beast is in much better shape then PORK SODA who is bleeding and not moving at all as TEB makes the cover right there, while the UK announcers cheer him on ! Jesse - " 1..... ...2...... ..3 " Cheryl - " And PORK SODA is OWN3D by ..... THE ENGLISH BEAST !!!!!!!!
" |
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Tely - " Folks, this has been a great night as the APWWF rejects get there just deserts ! " Styles - " I have too agree, even they know they are OWN3D beotches ! " Sheila - " After this quick real advertisement for some kick ass SXW PPV event, we'll be right back with the final execution ! " |
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COMMERCIAL Sunday, September 24th 2000, on X-Treme Island, a three hour long PPV event SXW X-TREME PREJUDICE !!!!!!! |
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Tely - " Finally match folks and the biggest joke of the APWW hippy, who is the biggest chicken shit on the face of the earth fights the blind master and this match is for the Exclusive SXW OWNS APWWF Championship Title Belt ! " Sheila - " Good luck Gomez, although you don't need it at all ! " |
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Cheryl - " The following match is A one fall, hard-core rules non title singles match. This match only needs a 10 minute time limit at best, and that is being nice !!! " referee - Jesse ' The Body ' Ventura The little fan boy hermi hippy skips out to the ring as Jim Crowchy plays " If I could save time in a Bottle " crap song plays an the fans toss every last bit of trash at him, he loves the punishment from fans and gets off on himself, the censors take care of that small problem ! Cheryl - " And his OWN3R ...... " A car is heard crashing, and the fans start to cheer."Suicide" starts playing, green and orange pyro's go off in the entranceway.Gomez jumps off the Xtreme-a-tron, does a perfect 360, and lands on his feet.He walks to the ring, grabs the ring ropes, and flips up into the ring. Cheryl - " Now in the ring, he hails from Dawson City Arizona, the
blind, the crazy.....GOMEZ!!!!!!!!!! " Of course it starts with hippy trying to take a cheap shot, but he lands flat on his face after Gomez flips right over him and then hits a Flying Head Scissors and then a Hurricanrana as the wuss hippy stands up. Hippy is toasted but is lifted into a Powerbomb and then a Springboard Moonsault Body Press(Asai Moonsault) and a pin but at two count Gomez breaks the count by lifting hippy up by his nappy unwashed hair and into a Dragon Spirit- Underhook Face Driver. Gomez gets charged by the pops from fans and he finds a camera, somehow with his blind 6th sense he looks right into it and yells " MIKEE B, this is for you !! " Gomez lifts hippy up into a Dragon Suplex then a 540 Splash and yet another top rope move, this time a very special Soulsearcher- Twisting Senton(bomb) and finally his Tarantula- Entraps his opponent's arms & legs between the ring ropes & himself and the wussy hippy gives up right away ! hippy - " I QUIT ...... I QUIT !!! OH PLEASE RELEASE
ME GOD DO I EVER QUIT !!!! " Cheryl - " And hippy is OWN3D by . the 1st ever and rightfully
so SXW OWNS APWWF CHAMPION After the match in an unusual act, Gomez releases hippy and smashes him in the face with his newly acquired title belt and then locks on the Edge of the Blade- Armbar and Arm Scissors(Rings of Saturn) telling the hippy wussy who is screaming in pain to say some words into a microphone the ring announcer holds down to his mouth. Hippy is shaking his head, he won't say it, but after additional pressure from Gomez's Edge of the Blade and hippy is singing like a school girl on crack ! hippy - " MIKEE B, YOU HAVE MY APOLOGIES, I AM SO SORRY I AM A FAN BOY PUNK ASS AND YOU ARE MY MASTER, YOU AND ALL OF SXW OWN ME AND I AM NOTHING COMPARED TO THE BEST .. THE SXW ~! " |
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....... was then cut off and the camera went to Cheryl Hunter
for the 'Now the Stage is Set' report
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NOW THE STAGE IS SET.. |
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Well that was fun cause SXW players could kick the crap out of any punk
ass who opposes there efederation and fun !
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PORK SODA, MUTED RADIO, SAWDUST, HIPPY you four punk ass are the lamest
little bitches in the world !
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Tonight you punks got OWN3D again, and you will keep getting OWN3D until
you shut the fuck up about how much you suck each other off in off topic
posts in the news groups !
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PORK SODA, you ain't shit little man and I forget your real name, but
I know it was a homo's name !
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So homo, do what little you still can and I am not talking about your
regular masturbation ritual to Bon Jovi videos !
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.....Join us in two days for TUESDAY NIGHT TURMOIL !!!!!
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Exclusive Footage Back stage friends and enemies of each other in SXW, celebrated together as their opponents where all hauled away to local hospitals and rejected any assistance with healing their wounds .. cause Minnesota nice goes Stone Cold in Winter beotches !!!!! |
HOUSE 
Tely - "
Hello folks and welcome to our first ever SXW House Show, live from
the target center in Minnesota home of this so called writer of SXW,
whatever that is !? "
Sheila - "
Tonight is going to be heck of a fun time as classic SXW stars destroy
bitter fan boys from some chump federation ! "
Styles - "
Well, some of the people from APWWF are not that bad, certainly they
deserve better then the stock that got shipped over for tonight's card
! "
